Big Write – Rose Blanche Story

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68 Responses to Big Write – Rose Blanche Story

  1. Michaela says:

    Well done everyone :D.

  2. Jay says:

    Mr French you put up my wrong work :[

  3. Salma's Mum says:

    Wow year 6 wolves! I really enjoyed reading your stories ! Especially the way you put tension in them! Well done Salma I am really proud of you ! Keep up the good work year 6 ! 🙂

  4. Olivia says:

    I think Nathan should be Big Writer of the Week! He makes me visualise what’s happening in the story. Oh, I do miss you all! 🙁

  5. Elsiez says:

    Wow everyone!! You brought so much tension to your story I can’t wait to see what happens next!! When I read your story’s pictures were building up in my head. You guys should be proud of yourself. Keep on trying and you’ll get better and better.

  6. nancie says:

    I really liked yours Elsie it was so interesting I wanted to carry on your story. I also predicted what I thought would happen next.

  7. Elsiez says:

    Sorry, that was meant to say Elsiez not Nancy sorry.

  8. Emily says:

    I love yours Edward!!!!! 😀 🙂

  9. zanab says:

    I really loved your Elsie, i could see you put a lot of effort in!

  10. Elsiez says:

    Youssef I really liked the way you made it seem like Rose was really scared and about to have a heart attack when her mum came. 😀

  11. Elsiez says:

    To improve you could try and work on some of your spellings.

  12. Elsiez says:

    Sophia your handwriting is great! 😀 Your work was interesting to read I really enjoyed it. I also loved your tense paragraph when the soldier was asking Rose where she was going!! well done Sophia keep the good work up!! 😀 🙂

  13. Elsiez says:

    Nice Eddy!

  14. Elsiez says:

    well done Oliver.

  15. Eddyz says:

    Jonan your work got even more tense as it went along, it was brilliant. You are such a creative writer keep it up!!

  16. Salma says:

    Wow welle done Elsie! I really loved how you put the tension in them! I wish I could read on even more ! Your handwriting is also really good!! Keep up the good work! 🙂

  17. Jonan's Mum says:

    What wonderful stories you all have written. I have really enjoyed reading the Big Write every week and look forward to reading your work each week. Keep up the great work everyone in Wolves.

  18. Katie's mum says:

    I really enjoyed reading everyone’s stories – they were all very descriptive! Well done everyone!
    Katie, the opening paragraph of your narrative is really detailed and captures how Rose is feeling about the children in the concentration camp and lets the reader understand how distracted she is. Good work!

  19. Mkay says:

    Well done Emeka and Year 6 for creating tense stories. You have all proven that you are capable of writing a good piece of writing. Emeka you made it creepy with good description and made tension when Rose had a shadow under her door.
    Emeka’s Mutti 🙂

  20. Ms. McMurtrie says:

    Well done Wolves! You have all thought a lot about Rose and what she might write in her diary. Your writing is well planned and creates visual images in the reader’s mind. It makes your work interesting to read!

  21. Tia's mum says:

    Wow Tia. That was very good but you’re missing out too many full stops and capital letters. You’re making me think twice about sending you to university!

  22. Tia's mum says:

    Wow Emeka it was very clever of you to see some German word in your writing. Especially the words you have chosen weren’t too hard to understand. Your mutti must be very proud of you.

  23. Elsiez says:

    Thank you salma!! 😀

  24. safiyyah(salmas cousin) says:

    Wow year 6 wolves ! Well done Salma! keep up the good work! 🙂 its great!!!!!!!

  25. Salma's brother (Nawfal) says:

    Wow Salma! Looks like you really paid attention to your work! Keep up the good work! Just make sure you read over your work and work on your tenses for example : First person,Second person and third person…. Well done keep up the amazing work! Well done once again Salma! I ‘m really proud of you ! 🙂

  26. Salma's brother (Naadir) says:

    Wow Salma well done ! You put in a lot of effort in your work! 🙂 ..
    _

  27. Younnes says:

    I liked your big write Nathan but try to make the story a bit more tense like a soldier spotting Rose Blanche then shouting at her for feeding the Jews.;)

  28. Abdul says:

    Keir I liked your writing however you never put a capital letters at the begin.

  29. Jay says:

    I really like yours Leonor I really like that you ended your work in a cliff hanger it left me in suspense. I really wanted to know what happens next !! ( It would be helpful if I didn’t know:) )

  30. Keir says:

    Well done everyone your work is amazing. I just love the tense,Maxxwell,Edward and Harry your stories put a image in my head well done everyone.

  31. Abdul says:

    Also I really liked everyone’s work in Wolves because your story was really moving.Keep it up!!!!

  32. Younnes says:

    Wow Emeka you made the story really tense! Next time read through your work because I noticed that some sentences didn’t make sense.;)

  33. Jay says:

    Good but there was a few mistakes in your witting.

  34. Eddyz says:

    Jonan and Maxxwell you guys are such creative writers.

  35. Salma says:

    I really like your narrative story. Your handwriting is also very neat. You also put a good image in my head! Keep up the good work!

  36. rico says:

    Edward I like your style of writing and your presentation

  37. Eddyz says:

    Harry you had a nice piece of writing just remember to put a capital letter after your full stops.

    • Edward says:

      Thank you for your advice Edward I will make sure that I use your advice in my next piece of writing.

  38. rico says:

    Maxxwell and Edward are so creative with their describing words and always show good presentation.

  39. Eddyz says:

    Keir you have such brilliant piece of writing you have good use of ellipses, you just need to work on your speed you are rushing too much!!! Slow Down.

  40. Yedidja23 says:

    To Elsie you have very creative and it could be better if you work on your presentation and you spellings

  41. Maxz says:

    Well done Harry try to remember your capital letters after full stops.

  42. Yedidja23 says:

    Maxwell you have amazing type of write and you have good use of conjunctions.

  43. Yedidja23 says:

    Youness I really like how you drew me into the big write especially the onomatopoeia.

  44. Harry says:

    Maxwell and Edward are very creative whith their words and always eager to do their work and are always making sure they put effort in their work

  45. Yedidja23 says:

    Youseff I like the you discribed the fear of rose

  46. Yedidja23 says:

    To Harry when I was read the piece of text a shiver came down my spine. Keep it up.

  47. Toibat says:

    I really like your work Tia it very good but you need to work on making it more clearer with more (boys) words . It was a very good.

    • Katie says:

      Toibat, I completely agree but your comment doesn’t set a good example for Tia if you don’t use proper grammar.

  48. Nathaniel says:

    Nice start Emeka, I really like the way you showed everyone how Rose was feeling instead of telling them.

  49. Katie says:

    Salma, I really liked your work,there were some minor mistakes but I’m sure you are more than capable of looking over it and fixing them so your story is ready for everyone to read and enjoy.

  50. Mkay says:

    Nathan used show not tell in your writing. You used very good description to make the me feel like I was there watching Rose Blanche help the Jews by taking her own food and giving it to them. 🙂

  51. Nathaniel says:

    Nice choice of words Emeka. I really like the way you showed that Roses mum was angry instead of saying that she was angry. ‘Asher mum walked into the room she was startled by what she said.

  52. Jonan says:

    Emeka, your writing was very tense and it put images in my head but I found some of it hard to read.

  53. Oliver says:

    Youness you created a very tense piece of writing.You done this by at the very end of you story a soldier was following Rose and by doing this it really makes the reader think that will Rose get caught.

  54. Jonan says:

    Younnes yours was very tense and exciting.
    Well done.

  55. Mkay says:

    J-Leigh your writing was very exciting. You made it quite tense throughout especially at the end when the Mayor was there. ‘Rose want to the gate to give them food. Suddenly the Mayor opened the door, Ruuun!’ 🙂

  56. Oliver says:

    Emeka you were very creative with writing on how you used sarcasm in writing because people don’t usually do that and it is really good and now you have inspired me to try and use sarcasm in my own writing.

  57. Younnes says:

    You made the story tense Abdul but be careful in what person your writing in.Because you kept on switching from third person to first person.

  58. Harry says:

    I think Younnes should be writer of the week because I read your writing and it made me feel like I was there.

  59. Harry says:

    Well done Jack you have a good piece of writing but next time try to stay next to the margin instead of floating off

  60. Jay says:

    Wow there so many comment who would you decide 🙂

  61. Toibat says:

    Peggy I really like your work and I thought it was really affective.
    The only thing you need to work on are your spellings.

  62. Toibat says:

    Well done everyone I thought every single person in Wolves worked very very hard on their work.

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